Posted in Freedom Friday

Daydreaming

When I was in grade school, I came home one day with a report card that made my bottom red. Oh, I’m sure whatever I brought home would have met with satisfaction in another home, but in my family, bad grades meant not getting my head in the game. Much of what I’d gone through growing up I’d have to blame it on one thing—daydreaming. And for this edition of Freedom Friday, I’ll tell you why.

Dr. Doom
Dr. Doom

Throughout my childhood, my brain would not shut down. While other kids studied their ABC’s in class, my mind drifted, wondering what it’d be like being a superhero. In my mind’s eye either I was swooping down to rescue a kid being bullied in the schoolyard or rescuing the world from the evil Dr. Durge. You see, Dr. Durge was my archnemesis growing up. He was a perfect amalgam of DC ComicsLex Luthor and Marvel’s Dr. Doom. In my world, Dr. Durge’s villainy had no end. And no sooner had I put him away for good in a New York state federal penitentiary, he’d escape for his next crime spree on humanity.

Of course, I had to pay a price for immersing my imagination too much into a world of my own device. My report cards would reflect my inattentive behavior. And my bottom would reflect my being unable to sit for a week. Naturally, by the end of the school year I’d have learned a valuable lesson and moved on.

Or did I?

I’m happy to report I never stopped daydreaming. In so doing, I imagined my life years later as to how I’d like to see myself. Again, I’m happy to say my life turned out exactly how I had seen it being. Would it have happened had I not pictured it in my mind? I don’t think so. Having the thought and the forbearance to continue on the imaginary road I’d set for myself made my life the way it is now. That imaginary road becoming more real as the goal materialized with every step I took toward it.

A long time ago, I learned a quote I can’t forget from now until the end of my days. It comes from the movie Flashdance, if you can believe it. The quote goes something like this:

“When you give up your dream, you die.”

It doesn’t matter who you are, what you do or what you have done, if you pictured your life as a doctor, a businessperson, a sailor or even a ballerina for that matter, and it doesn’t happen, that nagging feeling won’t go away. In some cases, the slow death is irreversible.

At the same time, I’m here to say it’s never too late to get it all back.

A 65-year-old woman I know had always wanted to learn to play the piano. She had that nagging feeling all her life, daydreaming how she’d perform for others and how happy she’d make others feel with her music. When she was fifty-five, she began to learn piano. Her dream to perform for others drifted closer as she got better and better.

She now plays piano for her church in songs of worship.

Field of Dreams (Photo credit: Chicago Tribune)
Field of Dreams (Photo credit: Chicago Tribune)

It’s never too late to fulfill your dreams. What’s that quote from Field of Dreams? Oh, yes: “If you build it, he will come.” Don’t allow a slow death to take hold so as your dreams disappear before your eyes. It’s never too late.

Build it. Live it.

As for Dr. Durge? He’s still around. Every once in a while he’ll appear only to meet once again with my superhero alter ego in a battle of good vs. evil. But he doesn’t have a chance. He always ends up in prison until the day he unleashes another wave of destruction on humanity.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

Do you daydream? If so, what do you dream about?

Posted in Women Who Wow Wednesday

Claire Colburn

“There’s a difference between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is merely the absence of success. Any fool can achieve failure. But a fiasco. A fiasco is a disaster of epic proportions. A fiasco is a folk tale told to others to make other people feel more alive because it didn’t happen to them.”

Kirsten Dunst is Claire Colburn
Kirsten Dunst is Claire Colburn

I wish I could take credit for that quote for Women Who Wow Wednesday, but it belongs to the main protagonist in the movie Elizabethtown, Drew Baylor played by Orlando Bloom, who recently bungled a design for a major shoe manufacturer. His fiasco obliterated the corporation’s bottom line to the tune of $970 Million. We might as well round it up to $1 Billion. Them there’s a lot of shoes. Even the company’s CEO couldn’t keep a straight face when he uttered the $1 Billion figure.

We next find Drew in his apartment on a stabbing contraption he built out of a stationary bicycle and a knife. Just as he was about to press the button to end his miserable life, the duct tape holding the weapon loses its stick. Drew is a failure even attempting to kill himself. That’s when his sister calls. His father died. He’s needed home in Kentucky.

On the plane, he meets flight attendant, the ever-serendipitous Claire Colburn played by Kirsten Dunst. Whatever depression Drew may have felt prior to meeting Claire disappears. Well, not so much because of her infectious positive outlook. On the contrary, his dark mood fades only replaced by his annoyance at her cheery disposition. Not one to fuss, she learns of Drew’s father’s name, “Ah, so you’re a son of a Mitch. Never met a Mitch I didn’t like. Fun, full of life. Like, everyone wants to be a part of Mitch’s club.”

After they leave the plane, she reminds Drew not to miss the 60B turnoff. Of course, he misses it. But once in Kentucky, he settles into his new digs at a hotel featuring a wedding party for the weekend. Alone in his room, he calls his sister and a handful of other people, including Claire. No one returns his calls. His anxiety returns, and some time later his cell phone rings. It’s Claire.

Kirsten Dunst as Claire Colburn
Kirsten Dunst as Claire Colburn

They make small talk for a while. As night approaches, Drew realizes there’s more to Claire than what he had first thought of her on the plane. Seems she says all the things he’s had on his mind his entire life. Their cell phone chat continues throughout the night into the next morning when they meet by the side of the road. She immediately has an idea, and leads him to sit on a stone wall overlooking a beautiful countryside to watch the sunrise.

What is it about Claire that Drew sees? Huh, it’s not that hard to figure out. Claire doesn’t allow life to beat her. Hope is in her soul and in her mind. A joy surrounds her few people possess. Whatever life throws her way, she keeps moving forward. This is what she says to Drew when he lingers on thoughts of his failure:

“So you failed. All right, you really failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You think I care about that? I do understand. You wanna be really great? Then have the courage to fail big and stick around. Make them wonder why you’re still smiling.

Her brand of optimism spills into every fiber of her being.

This is what she says about problems:

“I’ve spent so much time thinking about all the answers to the problem that I forget what the problem actually was.”

This is her take on sadness:

“Sadness is easier because it’s surrender. I say make time to dance alone with one hand waving free.”

Finally, about her mindset:

“And so we all became helpers, which I so can’t help. I can’t help helping.”

Beautiful Claire. Pure of heart. Filled with life. She doesn’t sport a gun. She doesn’t kill zombies. But who wouldn’t want a friend like Claire? Always anticipating. Always wishing. Her heart’s in the right place, and that’s all that matters.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

Have you seen Elizabethtown? What did you think of Claire?

Posted in Freedom Friday

Stream of Consciousness II

I wrote my first stream of consciousness post with no planning other than randomly choosing the Rocky quote I had used as a springboard for ideas. Today, for my Freedom Friday series, I’d like to try my hand on an additional post armed with nothing but a quote and no idea what will come out.

Again, to reiterate a couple of things from my first post, I write about zombies. It doesn’t mean I am a zombie nor does it mean I’m obsessed with death, although in the movie I’d taken the quote from, the main protagonist is. I enjoy life and living as abundant as I can without interfering with other people’s happiness. It sounds insane but it’s true. Also, the way stream of consciousness works is whatever comes to mind is what stays on the page. No editing. It’s a snapshot of my brain.

Now, I’ve been meaning to use this quote for a while. The opportunity, though, has never presented itself. It’s from the 1971 movie Harold and Maude about the relationship between a teenage boy obsessed with death and a septuagenarian woman living life to the fullest.

Anyway, I don’t want to say anymore. Here is the quote:

Harold and Maude
Harold and Maude

“A lot of people enjoy being dead. But they are not dead, really. They’re just backing away from life. Reach out. Take a chance. Get hurt, even. But play as well as you can. Go team, go! Give me an L. Give me an I. Give me a V. Give me an E. L-I-V-E. LIVE! Otherwise, you got nothing to talk about in the locker room.”

—Ruth Gordon as Maude in Harold and Maude

Big breath. Here we go:

Lions roar not to defend their territory or because they’re hungry, but to say, “I’m alive!” Their heart beats. Their hide is warm. Every single cell at their disposal goes into that roar. “I’m alive!”

We live each day thinking we have all the time in the world, not realizing that one day we’ll be gone. Our grievances hold us back. Our doubts shroud us in darkness. Yet, it’s never too late to press onward and upward.

I’ve failed. So what, everyone’s failed. I’m afraid. So what, everyone’s afraid. I can’t. Everyone can.

Whatever is holding us back, we have to let it go. If we don’t, we’ll die—eaten away by our own miserable wants.

No one ever said life was easy. It’s not. Life is hard. Life is disappointing. We could have all the money and success in the world, yet without happiness it’s all for naught. If someone says to us they’re happy because of such-and-such or so-and-so, don’t believe them. They are lying. Happiness does not come from without, but from within. Success is a byproduct of happiness.

Glory comes to those who don’t look for it. Beauty surrounds those who are the outcasts. Joy lives in those who have dedicated their lives to the weak.

Allow your words to travel as a whirlwind into the ears of the deaf. As lightening cracks, so let your life shine to those in darkness. As thunder rumbles, move others to action. Live each day with conviction, giving life to those who are dead in spirit. Let the earth shake beneath your feet causing others to stir from their seats.

Roar like a lion. “I’m alive!”

Did my stream of consciousness session make any sense? Should I think about preparing a number III?

Posted in Freedom Friday

Stream of Consciousness

When I write a post for my Freedom Friday series, I always envision it to be a placeholder for my life’s little adventures. I also think of how it will best reflect fun, whereby you the reader can determine with your very own eyes that I, who has chosen to write in the zombie genre, am normal folk with the same dreams and aspirations as everyone else.

For this reason, I’m going to try something different this week. I’m going to write this post in stream of consciousness. What that means is whatever comes to mind is what will remain on the page. No editing. This will be a snapshot of how I think.

Now, I have a number of topics I prepared ahead of time to get my juices flowing. I’ll pick one at random. Since I have them written down, I’ll close my eyes and point a finger at one of them.

Done.

I’ve chosen a quote from one of my favorite movie characters of all time, Rocky Balboa:

Rocky Balboa
Rocky Balboa

“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain’t you!”

So many thoughts. Rushing. Here we go.

A football team can only take so many hits before they hit back. When they do, nothing can stand in their way. They will mow down their opponent until there is nothing left of them. Courage is not by honor but by strife. Winning happens when you go beyond yourself to achieve the unachievable. When someone asks, “Can it be done?” the answer should be, “My name is Affirmative Action. Nothing from heaven on high to the earth beneath my feet will prevent me from doing so.”

Taking the path of least resistance will only offer a temporary win. In the end it will cause you to fail. If everyone else is doing it, doesn’t mean you have to. Success does not come by sight but by mind.

But I’m too short. I’m too tall. I’m too fat. I’m too skinny. My father beats me. My mother is on drugs. My brothers and sisters hate me. I’m poor. My life is a mess. I can’t go on another day. Why me? Why, why, why me? What have I done to deserve this?

No one can defeat you. You can defeat yourself. Only you. No one can take away your right to be the best person you can be. Only you can do that.

Take flight on eagle’s wings. Soar above the multitude. Perch on the footstool of heaven overlooking the ordinary. Keep to the sky, never letting go of the dream to move others as you would have others move you.

Stir. Encourage. Inspire.

Give hope to where there is darkness. Raise those who are low. Make strong the weak. Give dignity to the mortified. Let there be such an explosion of joy from your heart that no one can deny the optimism that lives within you.

Should I attempt to write in stream of consciousness again in the future? Did any of what I’ve written make sense?