Posted in Freedom Friday, Other Things

More than Friends

By the time you read this, it will have been a full two weeks since I wrote it. Yes, this is how far in advance I plan these things. Tonight, or rather two weeks ago, my wife read me a journal entry she’d written about our courtship almost a year before our marriage. I had to cross-reference it with my own journal entry for that same period to find what I thought of our friendship.

Journal
Journal

Can you believe we wrote journal entries of our experiences together before we got married, and we didn’t know we did until a few years ago? Enjoy this Freedom Friday post, it’s about my wife and I, and how we became more than friends.

As I’d mentioned, my wife and I kept journals. We didn’t know we did, and we certainly didn’t know we’d write about our experiences from two different points of views. For instance, a few months prior to making my intentions known that I’d wanted our friendship to move to a new level, she was dating other guys. Nothing came of those relationships, but she did learn what she didn’t want in a guy.

In the meantime, I’d written how I had dated widely—not the girl Widely—widely in the sense of extensively or broadly. I know, corny joke. Anyway, at the time, I’d dated almost every girl in our church. It was a goal I had, and I’d almost completed it had I not chased after my wife.

When we first met, we had zero attraction to one another. Yep. Zilch. Nada. Squat. Don’t get me wrong, we got along. We dated a few times, you know, because we liked each other’s company and all, but we didn’t have that “love at first sight” lightning bolt strike us like you hear other couples had happen to them. We just became good friends, which meant hanging with the same crowd, doing stuff together, and simply having fun. We didn’t feel any pressure to become anything more either. Our families and our church let us do our thing while they went on their merry way.

Marriage Rings
Marriage Rings

And thank goodness we weren’t part of one of those cults that grooms kids to get married as soon as they hit legal age, and then the couple pops out a bazillion kids, and then one or both feels empty, lonely, depressed ‘cause one or both had to give up their dream on account of thinking they were doing what they were supposed to do but now they’re scratching their head wondering what went wrong since, after all, they fell in love with each other as soon as their eyes met in second period Chem. class and those awesome feelings were there and, and, and…

Whew! Where am I? Oh, now I remember—us.

By contrast, our relationship grew slowly. We dated other people while we stayed friends. Our Saturday nights consisted of practicing our singing routine with our outreach group that toured retirement homes on Sundays. As well, throughout the week, we’d stay in touch by phone, talking about the mundane things in life, like the way the fabric softener hides in the clothes when sorting them in baskets.

But it wasn’t until one sunny afternoon when we’d gone to the library together that we had realized something else brewed beneath the simple conversations, the spur of the moment dinners, and the long walks. I’d noticed it months prior, yet she hadn’t come around.

I can never forget where we were. We stood between bookshelves with the Italian section looking straight at us. And it happened. A giddy moment between friends. We exchanged the words, “I love you.”

From that moment forward, the awesomeness kicked in. Whatever we thought we hadn’t felt for each had suddenly appeared in gushing waves of affection that remains to this day. Not a day goes by that we don’t hug or hold hands. Like the other day, when she picked me up in the pouring rain from my walk, and she didn’t immediately put the car in drive but just stared at me.

I said, “What?”

She said, “Well?” then smiled.

Oh, of course. I kissed her.

We drove home to where I wrote another journal entry for that day.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, now on sale.

How would you describe your relationship with the love of your life?

Posted in Freedom Friday

Ideas and Decisions

Most of my best ideas come to me at five in the morning while shaving. To a lesser degree, ideas also pop into my head while showering. What is it about personal hygiene that makes me want to think about the future? Does it have anything to do with washing away the cumulative dirt and grime from the day before in preparation for a new beginning? Let’s find out as I attempt to make sense of the whole thing for Freedom Friday.

The Blade
The Blade

When I was in that awkward age hitting puberty, I knew I had to start taking bathing more seriously. I mean, for two years I grew up on a farm in Italy, and access to running water was an issue for my family. So I understood the concept of washing my face, but beyond that, I was your typical boy running around, playing soccer in the mud, and getting all excited when my friends wanted to skip rocks down by the river. Mark Twain would have loved me.

Anyway, when I moved back to Canada with my parents, baths became a normal routine, and shaving all of a sudden needed my attention. I had just turned fourteen and my face looked like something out of Planet of the Apes. My dad had bought me my first razor. He was proud of me. I had finally reached maturity. Right, maybe physically, but mentally, even now at times, I still had the brain of a ten-year-old.

I can’t remember how long but if I’m not mistaken, shaving took me about fifteen to twenty minutes. I used to do it once, twice a week in the evening. I couldn’t do it before going to school ‘cause it took me, like, furr-ev-ah. At least, I thought. But once I was no longer a student, had a regular job, shaving turned into a daily chore. I couldn’t avoid it. My five o’clock shadow would always show up at around three in the afternoon.

Gosh, I’m reading that previous paragraph thinking, that’s an awful lot of information for a back story to what I wanted to talk about. Meh, I’ll leave it in. You tell me if you enjoyed it or not.

Okay, let’s travel to the present day. It roughly takes me five to ten minutes to shave every day now. Yes, every day, including weekends. Other than having my mind on the blade gliding on my face, my thoughts also wander. I think about things. Mull things over. Wonder and ponder on the meaning of why certain events happened the day before, the week before, that month. I don’t mean to. It just happens. Now I question if this is normal. I’m sure it is.

For instance, a millennia ago, it was while I was shaving that I’d decided to marry my wife. It was also when the idea popped into my mind about where we’d enjoy our honeymoon. Eventually, after a few years married, talk of kids came. As I would cut away the whiskers from my beard, I had convinced myself kids were a good thing to have. Believe me—I’m talking about months of shaving therapy here.

A beach in the Caribbean
A beach in the Caribbean

As life went on, thoughts of buying a house crept into the mix. Wanting to get a cat. Buying a used car. Getting a bigger house. Painting the rooms. Buying a new car. Planting a garden. Having another kid. Volunteering at the church. Driving the kids to their ball games. Planning vacations. Attending weddings. Attending baptisms. Attending funerals. Meeting new people. Having had enough of some people. Christmases. Easters. Thanksgivings.

Of course there were those mornings I’d think of other things too. Like, how long has that paint been peeling next to the mirror? Or, when did I last have an oil change? I’m sure it was last month. It has to be last month.

All in all, after the thousands of blades I must have consumed over the course of my lifetime, I have never regretted not wanting to have a beard.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

Where do your ideas come from? Have you ever made life decisions while performing menial tasks?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

Warm Bodies

Having seen Warm Bodies two nights in a row last month, the subtle thought of a zombie apocalypse entered my mind. I shouldn’t say subtle, I would say blaring. As funny as some scenes were, some interesting concepts came to the fore worth discussing. I’m hoping this Monday Mayhem post can do the film justice by exploring those ideas.

Warm Bodies (Photo Credit: Jonathan Wenk)
Warm Bodies (Photo Credit: Jonathan Wenk)

I’ll try writing this post having in mind not to give away any plot points or spoilers. I’ll attempt to keep it as general and as high concept as possible.

One of the main themes the movie emphasizes is love will cure all. It’s no secret that when people feel lost and alone they turn to family and friends for support. Why is that? Family is the crux of a stable society. When one becomes injured, family can help with raising the spirits. Who else knows us better than family? However, what is one to do when they possess a fractured family? This is where friends come into to play. Friends—good friends—the kind that have been there through good and bad, light and darkness, joy and pain, they’re the ones who can provide support when all seems lost. Warm Bodies makes it plain that having a support system will make all things better. Love will cure all.

Oh, Romeo, Romeo! The movie drips with references to Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet, which, by the way, aside from Hamlet and Othello, is one of my favorite plays of all time. Again, I ask the question, why? Why the references at all? Is there significance with the way the characters interact with one another and how the main theme plays out?

Warm Bodies (Photo Credit: Jan Thijs)
Warm Bodies (Photo Credit: Jan Thijs)

For those who don’t know, the story of Romeo & Juliet is about love conquering all. It’s about feuding families who, by death, quell their quarrels. The entire opening of the play gives away the whole story:

Two households, both alike in dignity,
In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross’d lovers take their life

As with the play, Warm Bodies tells of two families at war with one another, a war that can cease only with death. Yet, death is not what it may seem. For some, death may be life. And life is all that matters.

The last point the movie highlights is that no matter how bad things get, they can get worse, and they usually do. We shouldn’t ever give up on what we want from life—even if we’re in the throes of darkness. Our life is our own, to make of it what we will by sheer will and integrity.

These are the things I’ve learned watching Warm Bodies.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

Do you have a lesson you’d like to share having watched the movie? If not, do you plan to watch it?