Jack Flacco

Terminators vs. Zombies

Posted on April 7, 2014April 9, 2014 by Jack Flacco

They keep coming and coming and don’t let up. They’ll hunt you down and kill you without mercy. They have no soul. They’re impervious to pain. They are dead inside, unable to feel empathy or feel anything for that matter. They will not rest until every single human soul lies dead under their feet.

If you think I’m talking about terminators, raise your hands. C’mon, don’t be shy. They sound like terminators, don’t they? They’re not, at least not in my book. I’m talking about zombies. How many of you guessed right? Well, you’re wrong, too. They’re terminators. Not sure, are you? Welcome to another edition of Monday Mayhem.

For those not familiar with the origins of The Terminator movie, one day, director James Cameron was suffering from a very high fever when in the midst of his dreams a metal skull appeared to him. It had burst into flames and filled his mind in a frenzy of horror. When he awoke, he immediately took to his typewriter and within twenty-four hours had the treatment written of The Terminator. Just like that.

For those unfamiliar with a film treatment, it’s a short story written in present tense prose with a liberal dollop of the director’s style. It’s much more detailed than an outline.

The idea behind The Terminator lies in man’s quest for immortality. A terminator does not feel, does not ponder on life’s great mysteries, does not fill its head with silly arguments of what is right and wrong. It roams and kills. Nothing more. Not much different from the undead, really.

Let’s have a look at similarities between terminators and zombies.

Persistence—Terminators do not know when to give up. They will keep coming after its target until either it dies a terrible death or its battery depletes. The likelihood of its battery depleting is next to zero. Therefore, you can run it down, drive a metal rod through its body, crush it with a steel girder, and blow it up. It will still come after you without relent. A zombie works the same way. Once it spots its victim, it will stop at nothing to capture it. Other than a shotgun blast to the head, nothing will deter it from its aim to make human its main dinner dish. It will keep coming and coming. It will not stop until we’re all dead.

Roaming—Those treacherous endoskeletons travel long distances to achieve their mission objective. They smash through doors, crash through windows, overcome gun blast wounds all for the sake of killing their targets. They’ll even drag their way to them if they have to, which is no different from the undead who chase after their prey. No manner of defense will discourage zombies from their inordinate plan to attack and dismember their victims. And yes, they’ll also drag to capture their victim.

Unfeeling—The driving force behind a terminator is its mission to kill its target. It does not care if its intended target has a family. It does not equate the loss of life to the loss of a relationship. Its design dictates merciless killing as its goal. In much the same way, a zombie’s ultimate quest is to satiate its craving for human. It has no empathy for the potential loss of a brilliant life. It doesn’t understand the bond between humans, the love of a parent for a child, the love of a mate for a mate. It possesses no heart. It does not cry for its victim nor does it rejoice after the killing. It can’t do any of that because it simply does not feel. How dreadful a life when a sentient life walks the earth soulless, empty and void.

Regardless of the many similarities mentioned, and I’m sure you can think of more, you know what I would find interesting? Instead of terminators and zombies going after humans, why not have them in a massive battle against each other? Wouldn’t that be something to look forward? But I think we’d know who would win.

Can you think of other similarities between the metal endoskeletons and the undead?

Freedom Friday

A Law of Success

Posted on April 4, 2014April 7, 2014 by Jack Flacco

I’m a firm believer in being lazy. Now, now, before you go off thinking I’m a sluggard of a man, hear me out. I’m also a firm believer in working smarter, not harder. If it takes three days to accomplish a task, I want to know how I can cut that time to one day. Like I said, I’m lazy and any time saved is time earned to do other things of interest.

Welcome to my Freedom Friday post where I open my mind and allow my brains to fall out. Today I would like to place you at a vantage point into my thinking regarding work vs. rest. Don’t worry I’m not introducing anything radical you haven’t heard before. Perhaps, I’ll even learn something myself.

I’ve written about this subject in my posts Sleep and A Day Off. Not to be redundant, but in those posts I had mention how sleep is my secret weapon against creative slumps. I’m trying hard not to make it sound like I’m bragging. I’m relating information that works for me that may also work for others. Anyway, back to the subject at hand. My secret weapon against a creative slump, brain fog, and mind block is sleep. On the weekend, I sleep an inordinate amount of hours because during the week I keep a strict seven-hour sleep schedule, depending on the night and if I have to wake up early the next morning (eg. 4:30 AM—yeah, I’m on farmer’s hours).

Did I ever tell you I suffered from insomnia for a long, long time? I think I had mentioned it. Well, of course I did. I wrote about it in my Insomnia post. For a number of years I averaged two hours of sleep. Yes, you read that right—a number a years, two hours of sleep. I learned a thing or two.

Let’s get to the meat of this post.

You might ask, “Jack, what are you doing talking about the laws of physics?” Well, let’s take Newton’s First Law of Motion and analyze it further. There may actually be a lesson there for all of us.

The first part of the law states that an object at rest stays at rest. I learned some time ago that rest replenishes my creative flow by allowing my mind to mull over problems during my sleep cycle. My evidence? Without fail, every morning I wake up with a truckload of ideas I can’t wait to get down on paper. Many of my blog posts come from my early morning shaves soon after a good night’s sleep. I’m so used to it, I can’t wait to fall asleep knowing the next morning I’ll have some other ideas that will catch my fancy.

The second part of the law states that an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction. In my opinion, this is the ideal situation. Wouldn’t it be a grand thing to experience life in a constant predictable cycle? It can be. It means eliminating the distractions and carrying forward without anyone or anything getting in the way. It also means a heightened sense of concentration achieved by allowing you the rest needed to complete a task. Sounds counterproductive, but it does work.

Now, did you catch the fact I didn’t mention the last portion of the law? I left it last to make a point. It simply states that an object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.

We all have those unbalanced forces in our lives that seem to suck the energy from our productivity. That’s the negative part of the equation. We’re going on our merry way, doing what we set out to do, carrying on with our daily lives when suddenly something happens and we’re stuck in the middle of a battlefield picking up the pieces. Whether it’s a death in the family, job loss, an accident or a real bad day, this happens to everyone and we can’t avoid it.

The other side of the equation involves those same unbalanced forces setting our lives on fire by spectacular means, giving us a new perspective on things and leading us to change. I’m talking about the sudden proposal of marriage, finding out you’re going to have a baby, getting a promotion, deciding to buy a new house, and yes, even winning the lottery. Good things do happen to good people.

The trick to Newton’s law of motion is to keep life at an even keel. Too little rest, we procrastinate. Too much unbalanced force, we stress out. Steady as she goes, and we’re just right. Success comes when we gain that perfect balance. Once we attain that, nothing will stop us from achieving our dreams.

What other laws of physics can we utilize as a metaphor for success?

Women Who Wow Wednesday

Angela

Posted on April 2, 2014April 4, 2014 by Jack Flacco

Few movies have a feeling attached to the presentation. You know the ones, Lost in Translation, Juno, Elizabethtown. Although subjective, the feeling is that of loneliness coupled with the search for meaning. At times, dark comedy screams a message so clear that no one understands it. American Beauty is that way. It succeeds with showing what happens when preconceptions turn to fear. At the same time, the film opens the mind to a world not much different from our own, but sparkles with beauty.

Kevin Spacey & Mena Suvari in American Beauty

Women Who Wow Wednesday presents Angela, the cheerleader who captures the imagination of a middle-aged man forcing a change in him.

To know Angela (Mena Suvari) you must know Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey). Let him describe in his own words his life:

Later on, he says:

From there the focus shifts to his office cubicle where he sits slouched in his chair speaking with a client on the phone. If you study the mess he calls a desk, you’ll see a small sign hanging on his cubicle wall saying, “Look closer.” The sign is a message to the viewing audience from director Sam Mendes. It’s to encourage the viewer to pay attention because there’s more to this story than meets the eye.

In the midst of Lester’s middle class family lies a disturbing isolation within its members—the domineering wife, the negligent father, the angry teen. Each have their own agenda, each want validation for their role in the family.

When Angela finally appears in the film, Lester has all he can do to get out of the evening drive to support his daughter’s cheerleading squad, the same squad cheering for the town’s basketball team. His excuse? He says he’s missing the James Bond marathon on TNT.

When meeting Angela for the first time she gives the illusion she’s self-absorbed and indifferent. Her attitude hovers around “you scratch my back and I’ll accept it.” But remember the movie’s tagline? Look closer.

Angela possesses the ability to move people into doing things they wouldn’t do had she not inspired the change. In Lester’s case, it’s obvious. She’s a Rockwell High award-winning Dancing Spartanette. She strikes him. His mind scrambles and all of a sudden, he’s a teenager again, wanting to get to know her like all the other teenage boys her age. The only difference, he’s not a teenager. He’s a married man. For someone such as Angela to spur those feeling in someone without regard to marital status, she must really have something wrong with her.

The truth is, though, you’ll have to look closer. There’s more to Angela than the outward snob moniker she wears so well. She sports a vulnerability few have seen other than Lester. That vulnerability comes to play later in the film, regardless of us having to deal with her current label as the class tease.

What else makes Angela different? Even if she feels there’s nothing worse than being ordinary, she proves she’s more mature than any girl her age. How? Remember how knowing Lester is the same as knowing Angela? His change in mindset couldn’t have happened hadn’t Angela shown up in his life. Had she not given him a second breath, a second hope for the future, he would have been a recluse for the rest of his miserable existence. Angela did that—not Lester. She did it by simply becoming a symbol to what he wanted from life—hope. She provided him that hope.

What did you like about American Beauty? What did you think of Angela?

Monday Mayhem

Zombie Virus

Posted on March 31, 2014April 2, 2014 by Jack Flacco

Visiting the hospital the other day made me wish I’d fallen victim to a real life zombie virus. As I roamed the corridors, a man sporting a seemingly healthy complexion passed my wife and me around the corner. Negotiating the maze of hallways, we saw the man pass us by again. This was no accident, I thought. As we slipped into the nurses’ station, he had passed by once more behind us. It’s with some apprehension I thought he was following us. Yet, that wasn’t the case. He simply was tracing the same route minute-by-minute, regardless if we were there or not. He was a true walker.

This strange episode left me with the idea that we’re searching everywhere for the zombie virus to appear but instead, perhaps, we already have it flourishing in our society. We just don’t know about it.

In this edition of Monday Mayhem, I want to explore two common diseases and one psychological condition that correlate to symptoms matching those of zombie physiological behavioral patterns. This may get gory, so be forewarned.

The Common Cold—Also known as nasopharyngitis, rhinopharyngitis, and acute coryza, the common cold has over 200 strains at its disposal to which it can render us helpless in no time. Between ten days and three weeks, the virus can wreak havoc with our immune system, causing fatigue, loss of appetite, headache and muscle ache. Fever tends to happen with infants and young children. The common cold falls under the coronaviruses umbrella of bugs, the same family of viruses responsible for SARS. Similar to many of the zombie viruses written about in fiction, the common cold’s ferocity of transmission makes it a good candidate for an apocalyptic mutation, less the bite, of course.

Flesh-Eating Disease—Going by the medical name necrotizing fasciitis, the disease consumes tissues and layers of skin transforming everything in its wake into a rotten mass. During the course of its growth, the epidermis takes on a dark appearance. If left untreated, the infection can spread rapidly throughout the body, which would then lead to death. Not a trivial matter, much like a zombie virus, this disease shows the effects of death on a living being. I’m not about to post photos of what the disease looks like in full bloom, consuming a human body. The only difference with a zombie virus is the victim’s ability to retain cognitive reasoning.

Catatonia—Although not a disease in itself but a syndrome, catatonia presents an interesting set of symptoms that one may speculate comes directly from a zombie book. Patients of the condition exhibit peculiar motor movements such as stiff posturing, posses and grimacing. They also demonstrate purposeless actions when entrenched in a state of catatonic excitement, making it one of the most dangerous mental states in psychiatry. Brought about by other mental illnesses (e.g. depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia), catatonia bears striking similarities to those infected by a zombie virus, where the victims roam about without direction, expressing no visible sign of sentience.

The common cold, flesh-eating disease and catatonia are a few of the diseases/conditions I thought of right off the top of my head when comparing zombie virus symptoms with real life aliments. I’m sure you can think of more, considering I’ve only scratched the surface. Who knows, perhaps one day I may revisit this topic citing controversial psychological studies as the basis for an in-depth study of my own. Until then, we can indulge in some fun speculation as to the nature of the zombie virus.

Where do you think the zombie virus will come from?

Freedom Friday

Spam

Posted on March 28, 2014March 31, 2014 by Jack Flacco

Since it’s Freedom Friday and since it’s the end of the week for some of us, I thought I’d treat you to some fun—the best kind of fun—fun at the expense of others. Anyone watch America’s Funniest Home Videos? Well, that’s not the fun I had in mind. I’m talking about the comments I sometimes receive from these automated spam machines in the comments area of my posts.

Oh, I got your attention, I see.

We all get them, some more than others do. I’m talking about comments falling in our moderation queue that attempt to sell us overpriced shoes, gaudy jewelry, and even try to fish us into believing they like our posts. You don’t have to admit anything. I’ve fallen for a couple myself believing they were legitimate until I’d discovered that once I’d released one spam on my blog, a flood of them appeared overnight as I frantically pressed the delete key to get rid of them all.

This is the type of stuff I get in my comments queue awaiting my moderation:

“I am regular reader, how are you everybody? This post posted at this website is actually good.” ~Wedding Planner

Where do I start? First, you’re missing “a”, as in “a regular reader”. If you want to sell me stuff, learn proper grammar. Second, “how are you everybody?” Should I worry at one time in my life you’ve spoken with one of my schizophrenic personalities I didn’t know I had? Third, “This post posted”, yeah, I got it. You don’t have to be redundant about it.

“I really like what you guys tend to be up too. This type of clever work and exposure! Keep up the terrific works guys I’ve included you guys to our blogroll.” ~Free Sex Chat

You guys? Again you’re trying to convince me I’m schizophrenic. I’m one guy, Jack. Get it right. “This type of clever work and exposure!” Whoo-hoo! I can feel your excitement but I have no clue what you’re talking about. Does the term complete sentence mean anything to you? “Keep up the terrific works guys…” Much like the Wedding Planner dude, you also seem to have a problem with grammar.

“Thіs post is in fact a good one it assists new web people, who aree wishing for blogging.” ~Buy Followers

Seriously, I have no clue as to what you’re trying to say to me. I’m lost.

And I’ve saved the best for last.

“Someone necessarilу lend a hand to make significantly articles I might state. That is the first time I frequentеd yoսr website pazge and so far? I amazed with the analysis you maԁe to create this particular publish incredible. Great actiνity!” ~Promo

I’m considering I may actually need another personality after reading your comment. Oh, look, it’s kicking in now—neener nanny, neener nanny, neener nanny.

Nowadays, I don’t even look at my spam queue—well, I had to for this post, but you can blame it on my other personalities. With over two hundred of these messages I receive over the course of a few days, I don’t have time to sift through the chaos to determine what is good and what is bad. I certainly do get a laugh out of the ones I do receive though, and the messages equally provide many hours of amusement at the expense of the spammers.

Have you received spam email? What was the funniest one you received?

Women Who Wow Wednesday

Mako Mori

Posted on March 26, 2014March 28, 2014 by Jack Flacco

Pacific Rim is one of those movies where one viewing just isn’t enough. So much happens with every scene that the movie’s charm glitters even more so after multiple viewings and with plenty of popcorn.

From the grand scale cast comes an intrepid fighter with a grudge to settle and the will to die for an ideal filled with hope. Women Who Wow Wednesday celebrates Pacific Rim’s Mako Mori.

Japan once again becomes the footstool to giant monsters, this time they’re called the Kaiju. To fight against them, humanity builds skyscraper-sized robots known as Jaegers, fully armed and packing the heat to take down the Kaiju in the streets of the small island. Controlled by two pilots, the Jaegers become fodder to the Kaiju’s weapons of mass destruction. In hopes of stemming the clash with the mainland, the world’s military take one last chance on former Jaeger pilot Raleigh Becket (Charlie Hunnam) in an attempt to defeat the Kaiju.

As part of the Jaeger program, Raleigh needs a partner of equal talent to pull off the impossible—the destruction of the Kaiju. Played by The Brothers Bloom’s Rinko Kikuchi, Mako Mori is program leader Stacker Pentecost (Idris Elba)’s right-hand go-to girl. If anyone knows anything about the invading monsters, it’s Mako. She’s met one up close and personal. Her experience leads her to team up with Raleigh in a battle of nerves against the giants.

To control the Jaegers, Raleigh and Mako need to hook up to become drift compatible. Drifting’s all about melding the pilots’ brains into one in order to maximize strategy and control the giant robot. Without it, the pilots would die.

Mako’s resiliency proves to be on the cutting edge of the Kaiju’s bad side. She displays a cunning for fighting Raleigh hasn’t seen since the death of his previous partner of war. The skill by which she deploys the weaponry proves surprising as they dispatch one monster after another in the heart of a battle-infested ocean.

What makes Mako admirable is how she doesn’t run away from insurmountable odds, but sticks to her guns, plows ahead and fights without so much as a whimper. She doesn’t scamper from her problems, scared. She doesn’t cry because things are too hard for her. No. Mako stands her ground and doesn’t budge on the first sight of trouble. What’s more? She trusts Raleigh with her life. No matter how bad things get, she learns to let go and allow herself to surf the drift with Raleigh by her side as her closest friend in arms. She doesn’t care what others think. She gets the job done.

Mako Mori lives as she preaches, without fear and having the will to fight no matter what stands in her way.

What did you think of the movie Pacific Rim? What do you think of Mako?

Monday Mayhem

Zombieland Rules

Posted on March 24, 2014March 26, 2014 by Jack Flacco

I love Zombieland. I can watch that movie several times in a row without getting bored. I also love the little things about it. I love how Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) loves Twinkies. What’s not to love about a zombie slaying Twinkie lover who just as well bash the brains of the undead than have a civilized conversation? Have I overused the word love yet? That’s why for today’s Monday Mayhem series I want to write about the Zombieland rules. Do you know what they are? Have you ever heard of them? If not, you’re in luck. Have a gander below to find out what they are.

Rule #1—Cardio: Do you want to survive the zombie apocalypse? Get in shape. Zombies nowadays are speed demons. They can dash from one side of a football field to another in seconds. Best keeping one step ahead of them than finding yourself served as the main course to a zombie buffet. No one wants that.

Rule #2—Double Tap: Here’s how this works, one of the undead races towards you and you blast it in the head. Don’t be cheap. Unload another bullet in their rotting corpse for insurance. You’ll never know you killed it unless its jaws lock on your jugular. By that time, it’ll be too late. Use another bullet. You’ll be glad you did.

Rule #3—Beware of Bathrooms: One thing’s for sure, when a zombie’s after you, you don’t want to have your pants down. Avoid bathrooms. Toilets kill. Zombies can smell you a mile away. You want privacy? Get lost in the woods with a small shovel. Once you’re done, pile the dirt and disappear. You don’t want that stuff getting on your shoes to have a horde after you because of improper waste management.

Rule #4—Seatbelts: If anything’s certain during the zombie apocalypse, you’ll be running hard. The second point of certainty is you’ll be driving fast. You’ll always want to have your seatbelt firmly secured around your waist. The highways will have obstacles everywhere and if you should so hit one of these obstacles, you’ll be taking a header through the windshield on to the highway ahead. Always wear your seatbelt.

Rule #7—Travel Light: Do you think you’ll have time to pack your bags and hit the road when zombies are knocking at your door? Of course not. You won’t have enough time to think, let alone pack. Much like an expectant mother, it would be a good idea to keep a knapsack prepped either at the foot of the door or the window. You’ll want to carry guns, knives, bullets—you know—the essentials. Rope will come in handy, too. But the reality is once the zombies spot you and chase you, you’ll have little else to do than run. You can’t run fast if you’re packing heavy.

Rule #11—Check the Back Seat: Have you ever seen those Horror flicks where the girl dives into the driver’s seat of her car after having ran a mile from an unknown entity? Can you tell me what happens next? Right, someone or something hops from the back seat and makes her into a side serving for lunch. Always, always check the back seat of your car.

Rule #16—Limber Up: The worst thing that can happen to you when running as fast as you can from those maggot bags is pulling a muscle ten feet into your escape plan. How could it happen in the first place? You didn’t limber up. You see, during the apocalypse, you won’t have time to fall on your backside because you’ll be too busy running. You’ll need to keep in shape if you’re to avoid the dreaded mandibles of the undead latching on to your leg. While you’re doing other things, throw in a few jumping jacks. Better still, toss in several pushups. After all, a limber human is a saved human.

Rule #17—Don’t be a Hero: Everyone loves a hero, but how great is a hero if said hero ends up as a meal? Let’s admit it, pulling the trigger on a zombie and watching its brains splatter against the wall is fun. And if you save someone in the process, it’s a thrill. However, if it’s you against them and you have nothing to gain, better save your ammo and run. Those few seconds contemplating how glorious zombie brains would look all over the dash could have gone to better use like, hightailing it out of there while you still have your life in your hands. Always run.

Rule #32—Enjoy the Little Things: Remember your first crush? Remember how it felt learning you’d passed your worst subject in school by the skin on your nose? Remember your first Twinkie? In the hustle and bustle of a killing the undead, we’ll tend to forget the little things that make life special. Take a moment between kills to reminisce about life’s little wonders, about the beauty that was and the joy you gain when thinking of the simple things. Who knows? Maybe one day you’ll also find the last Twinkie on earth and know what I mean.

What are the official Zombieland rules? Where can I find them?

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: