A few months ago, I wrote Classic Literature Zombie Style, a post dedicated to classic literature benefiting from a zombie facelift. Many folks liked it, participating in adding their own version of books with a zombie twist. For this Monday Mayhem, I thought I’d add a Part II to the series and see where it takes us.
Are you ready to enter the world of zombie literature? Well then, what are we waiting for? Here is my version of classic literature zombie style:
Moby Dick and Zombies—Ahab’s sanity: “The undead’s madness deceives the soul. When you think you are fed, it transfigures you further into some hideous creature also known as—human.”
Emma and Zombies—Emma talking to Harriet about Martin: “I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a monster of bountiful means cannot cleanse the entrails of its screaming victim, it is not a monster fashioned from death, but human. Of course, do not imagine that I want to influence you.”
Dracula and Zombies—Van Helsing criticizes his protégé: “Ah, it is the fault of our science that it wants to explain all. How can it explain the lust of the flesh, the drinking of the blood and the craving of the sinew if a dead man cannot walk? Is there no vampire that can stop the undead?”
Frankenstein and Zombies—Victor warns Walton: “How dangerous is the acquirement of knowledge and how much happier that man is who uses that knowledge against the spawns of the grave. For the grave dwellers hearken to no one and they will devour those who so foolishly perceive their homes safe.”
The Great Gatsby and Zombies—Nick: “There are only the hunted, the hunting, the eaters and the eaten. No more, no less. The dead walk among us.”
Of Mice and Men and Zombies—Crooks talking about loneliness: “A guy needs somebody. A guy goes nuts if he ain’t got nobody. Don’t make no difference if he’s dead and risen from the grave, festerin’ at the jaw, chewin’ at the maggots, long’s he’s with you. I tell ya, it don’t get too lonely with the dead walkin’ ’bout.”
The Scarlet Letter and Zombies—Roger tormenting Arthur: “No creature, for any considerable period, can say it is not a zombie. Its hunger betrays it and its countenance screams its identity.”
To Kill a Mockingbird and Zombies—Atticus: “You never really understand a person until you rip his eyes out from its sockets. Until you search inside of his stomach and twirl it about.”
Little Women and Zombies—Louisa May Alcott: “I want to do something splendid…something heroic. I want to tear the lungs out of a zombie and hang them on a tree. I want to disembowel the creature until the branches are covered with its dripping intestines.”
Lord of the Flies and Zombies—Jack: “We’ve got to have rules and obey them. After all, we’re not human. We’re zombies, and the zombies are best at everything.”
Your turn, have a go and try a few. See if you can add to this list.
RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.
Do you have a quote you like best? What is it that you like about zombies?
Looking to God 
I rarely happens, but I think the sequel post is even better than the first! Thanks for the laughs 🙂
Oh, wow, thanks so much! I’m always trying to best myself. I’m my only competition!
Lord of the Flies doesn’t change much in its zombification, does it? Though I’m entirely enthralled by the thought of Jem and Scout as zombie hunters. Word.
I’ve been trying to read your post all. day. long. For some reason my computer decided it hated your blog today. Don’t worry. My computer and I rarely agree and this is no exception.
Firstly, please write all these books. I’ll read them.
Secondly, Hamlet!
“One may smile, and smile, and be a villain. In smiles, villainy reveals its rotten pearls. It cannot be hid in stench, in lack of slumber, in ceaseless hunger.”
“To die, to sleep–To sleep, perchance to dream–ay, there’s the rub. For in this sleep of death there are no dreams, but nightmarish hunger grasping rotten hands at life from a state of peaceless death.”
And, of course:
“Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.”
Well, my computer and I have a weekly one-on-one, touching base of outstanding issues. I’m always praising it in an effort to stem any hard feelings for past slights I may have inadvertently committed.
Ack! You did Hamlet! How beautiful is that? Oh, how I love this book. Outstanding job with the zombie twist.
Threatened defenestration is the only way to keep wayward electronic devices in line – but you have to be willing to go through with it if they don’t do as they’re told!
I wish I had a ‘Like’ button for the comment, Colin.
The other side of the coin, it could also mean removing Windows from the operating system in order to install something far less intrusive. In that respect, defenestration may prove quite helpful!
Defenestration.
My new word.
Rome and Juliet
These violent delights have violent ends
Where zombies tear thee limb from limb,
like fire and powder
Which, in bliss, they consume
I love your Of Mice and Men quote. Clever stuff all around!!
Mercutio is my favourite character in R+J. I’d love to see that sequel!
Oh dear oh dear, did you HAVE to do that to my Emma?? 🙂
You could do a really nice sequel to Romeo and Juliet which picks up with them coming back to life after they’ve committed suicide, leading an army of their fellow undead to wreak revenge on the Capulets and the Montagues. And for the quote: “What light through yonder window breaks? ‘Tis the east and Juliet is back to eat your brains!”
I’ve always been partial to the Capulets. If any army will rise, it will be against the Montagues. I’ll have an invasion led by “worm’s meat” Mercutio, who died at the hands of Juliet’s cousin Tybalt. He had cried a plague on both their houses, so I wouldn’t think he’d have a problem taking out Montague himself, the instigator of the grudge.
“From forth the fatal loins of these two foes, a pair of flesh-eaters brandish their teeth.”
You know, this idea might actually have some teeth (if you’ll pardon the pun!), with, as you say, the dead Mercutio coming back to get revenge on the two warring houses by and sending a plague of zombies to descend on them. I think I’m going to have to put some thought into this (although it’s a while since I read the play).
Having thought about this over a couple of beers last night, I’m going to be posting a Shakespearian-inspired zombie flash fiction featuring a zombie Mercutio in the weekly short story slot on my blog tomorrow (3pm UK time). The link should be: http://wp.me/p2PdIc-og. Thanks for the inspiration on this, Jack.
I’m excited already! I’ll look for it, Colin.
It’s an odd little piece, and I’ve just used the characters rather than the Shakespearian style, but it convinces me that this would be worth exploring in more depth if I can get the time to do it (which, unfortunately, is unlikely in the near future).
I’ll look forward to hearing what you think of it once it’s out.
Oh, I love this so much. Especially the Gatsby one! Meanwhile, since I’m on a Much Ado kick today …
“Officers, what offence have these men done?
DOGBERRY
Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have
belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying (undead) knaves.”
Great addition, amb. Nothing quite like adding some flare to a classic!
😀
Awesome!
No, not Atticus! lol
LOVE the Gatsby edition. Very cool.
Beowulf and Zombies:
The undead climbed eagerly up the gangplank,
clothing churned in the surf, warriors loaded
a cargo of weapons, unneeded for their feasting,
in the vessel’s hold, then heaved out,
away with a will in their wood-wreathed ship.
To conquer. To slay. To feed.
(Yeah, I know, I’m not a zombie person by nature and adding “and zombies” to anything classic freaks me out, but Beowulf seems suitable. 🙂 )
Yes, Atticus! Also loved playing around with The Great Gatsby. My favorite is Of Mice and Men. Loved talking in like I was from the Ol’ South.
Your Beowulf and Zombies was perfect. It transported me to where I needed to be. You might just have zombie blood in you yet!