Category: Monday Mayhem

Posted in Monday Mayhem

Why do Zombies Eat Brains?

Posted on by Jack Flacco

The film The Return of the Living Dead pioneered the popular idea of zombies eating brains. Prior to this concept, zombies had an appetite for anything human, not just brains. For my new readers, this is Monday Mayhem where I talk about zombies. And other stuff. But mostly zombies.

The Human Brain
The Human Brain

In the movie Warm Bodies, the main character, a zombie named R, kills a man, cracks open his head and scoops out a vast portion of his brain to consume on the spot. R saves some for later. The film does a good job presenting a seamless string of memories from the victim’s brain as if it were streaming through R’s rot-laden head. R feels that much more human when taking in the victim’s memories. Here’s what R thinks:

“There’s a lot of ways to get to know a person. Eating her dead boyfriend’s brains is one of the more unorthodox methods.”

But is that the real reason why zombies eat brains?

Modern day zombies breed from a virus. The typical contagion seeps through the blood of the victim, changing their composition thereby rendering them undead. The term undead means the victim died and rose from the dead. Classic zombies sport a morbid, pasty look, their eyes dull and their clothes shredded. They are shells of their former selves with nothing in their hearts and minds other than the craving for human flesh. Not much different from the folks you meet on Twitter’s Direct Messaging.

The Brain
The Brain

This craving is the key to zombiehood. For those unsure, zombies eat the flesh not to survive, but to satisfy an inner hunger born from becoming undead. Even if the zombie has its stomach removed, the craving exists, which makes it all the more vicious since its hunger originates not from self-preservation but from malicious intent bent on destroying humans or propagating the zombie virus.

Regardless of knowing this, we still need an explanation as to why zombies eat brains.

Before The Return of the Living Dead made its debut, zombies only consumed human flesh. But once the movie came out, the modern version of a legend rose from its frames. All of a sudden, zombies ate brains.

Why?

Nothing could be simpler: Brains provide zombies with the necessary endorphins to dull the pain of Rigor Mortis brought about by decomposition. The more brains, the less pain. In some ways, zombies get a high consuming the delicacy. And with that idea in mind, is it a wonder no one thought of it sooner?

A Note of Thanks

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE shot to #5 last night on Amazon’s Horror Best Sellers list here in Canada. Check out who the top 5 horror authors are in Canada:

#1 Stephen King
#2 Dean Koontz
#3 Stephen King
#4 Eric Tozzi
#5 Jack Flacco

The book’s also hit #420 on the Amazon Best Sellers Rank on Amazon.ca.

It’s also tracking as #6 for both Best Sellers in Children’s Horror books and ebooks.

And #3 on the Hot New Releases in Horror Fiction.

Finally, #1 on the Hot New Releases list in Children’s Horror.

I’m in shock. I wouldn’t have imagined it possible that something like this would have happened. I’m sincerely grateful for all those who have reviewed my book prior to release. I thank all those who have thrown me kind words my way these past few weeks. And I can only say that you—the audience—have made this book a success. I’m now without words.

Thank you again, everybody.

Did you know that zombies eating brains is a recent concept originating from The Return of the Living Dead?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

Zombie Sounds

Posted on by Jack Flacco

Whenever I watch a zombie movie, the very first thing I notice is the sounds emanating from those vile beasts. If I hear cricking and cracking, then I know I have a winner on my hands. It’s those movies where the undead lurch but remain silent that I think why hadn’t the director thought of what real corpses sound like and insert those effects into the picture. Monday Mayhem is all about zombies, and today I want to spend some time on zombie sounds. Sounds weird, doesn’t it?

My town's cemetery
My town’s cemetery

In my previous posts Rising from the Dead and Indestructible Zombies I detail the various states of human decomposition. One of the phases that a body goes through once it dies is Rigor Mortis. In this state, the body stiffens to the point of rigidity whereby muscles harden and become difficult to move by an external force. Alfred Hitchcock’s Frenzy depicts a perfect example where someone attempts to compel a body to do what it can no longer do due to stiffening. In Frenzy’s case, the murderer attempts to retrieve a lost object but then has difficulty doing so because of the body’s inability to bend like it did when alive.

That’s why the movie The Mummy has a certain appeal. Throughout the entire film, the mummy, which is nothing more than a glorified zombie, cricks, cracks, spurts, and oozes all sorts of noises toward its transformation to becoming human again. Why don’t all zombie movies sound like that?

My town's cemetery at twilight
My town’s cemetery at twilight

Imagine if you will a horde of the undead giving chase. You hear the dragging. You hear the hauling. You hear the moaning. Wouldn’t it be all the more terrifying to hear their bones snapping back and forth on their way to making their victim their supper?

There’s a saying: Where there’s smoke, there’s fire. What if the saying went: Where there’s cricking and cracking, they’re zombies. Wouldn’t that be something?

I suppose the sound of zombie cartilage readjusting is impossible in a movie where a virus takes over the victim. After all, depending on the virus, the victim hasn’t really died—at least not in the traditional sense of the word. They’ve only changed to become movable corpses. And if an antidote exists for zombies in the form of changing them back to their former selves, then by all accounts, they never really died in the first place.

Do you see where I’m going with this?

If they never died, there’s no opportunity to make the sounds I wish they could make. The only way that could happen is if zombies rise three hours after death just when Rigor Mortis had set.

Then again, zombies could rise during that sweet moment after death with bodies unaffected by the decomposition phase. In that instance, you will not hear them coming. In a sense, they could appear and eat you while you’re still alive.

I don’t know about you, but I’d rather hear them coming.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, now on sale.

What do you think? Should future zombie movies have the undead sounding like an army of breaking bones as they march for the attack? Or would you fear them more silent?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

My Book Release

Posted on by Jack Flacco

It’s not every day I can say tomorrow I have a book releasing. It’s not as if I write a book every day. That’d make me one fast writer, for sure. It would also make me an incredible genius. Believe me, as much as I’d like to punch myself in the arm, no way would I consider myself an incredible genius. Not by a long shot.

Jack Flacco takes you to the edge of horror
Jack Flacco takes you to the edge of horror

For instance, I mess up directions whenever I go anywhere with my GPS. Somehow, the voice-assist stating, “800 meters, turn right” sets off a chain reaction in my brain that propels me to want to take the next right turn instead. Even if there’s 400 meters remaining for the turn. Also, I sometimes put on two different socks. But maybe you can forgive me in that respect since I do wake up at 5:00 A.M., and different shades of blue all look the same at that hour. And when I cut the lawn, I sometimes miss spots. I’ll notice it two days later when I’m having breakfast in our garden-view kitchen, and a strip of lawn waves at me, teasing me by saying, “You missed.”

Genius? Hardly.

I’m not very good with marketing either. The best I can do is slap on a few words to a picture about my book, and post it on my Facebook page and Twitter account hoping you might like it without my being too intrusive. Believe me, I dread these days I have to talk about my book. It’s something that does not come naturally and takes me forever to come up with words that wouldn’t make me sound like I’m bragging. Because that’s what I don’t want to do—sound like I’m bragging.

For this reason, I’m dedicating this Monday Mayhem post to my Review Team. These folks volunteered their time and energy to read Ranger Martin and The Zombie Apocalypse in order to not only provide me feedback, but to also give potential readers an honest opinion. It’s best hearing what they have to say than for me to open my mouth so you can watch my brains fall out.

Meet the Review Team

Jerry B.’s Trip Through The Mind—“Ranger Martin and the Zombie Apocalypse is the type of story that draws you in and keeps you engrossed page after page.”

Bradley L. Bodeker’s The Insanity of a Mad B@stard—“Ranger Martin and the Zombie Apocalypse is not your typical genre rehash of things you’ve seen, heard, read before. From the first time I popped open the book, I was glued to the pages.”

ButterflyMumma—“Jack has a filmmaker’s sense of pacing and action. The book opens with a bang—Ranger is facing off against the oncoming horde on page 1… Stay-tuned for the film. This book was meant for the screen.”

Sonya Solomonovich’s Swashbuckler’s Tales—“Jack Flacco excels at bringing the zombie-fighting action to life with his own brand of dynamic comic-book flavored violence.”

Heather-Joan’s Serenity’s Musings—“I am not a fan of the reading sci-fi or zombies genre, but as far as Ranger Martin and the Zombie Apocalypse is concerned, I was hooked on page three and I couldn’t put it down after that.”

Patrick Todoroff’s Hot Space Station Justice—“The genuinely refreshing thing is while RM is fraught with tension and action, (and zombies) it keeps from decomposing into ponderous, grim darkness with a salting of black humor and a light tone.”

Kim’s Tranquil Dreams—“The book has quite a bit of intense action especially in the last few chapters. However, aside from it being very much action, in a way that you feel like you are reading a movie, Jack writes in a way where I had an easy time picturing and seeing in my mind what was really going down. It’s a pretty fun experience for the most part and especially in most situations, we always have Ranger Martin bringing in some witty smartass comment to loosen up the intensity sometimes.”

Katie Sullivan’s The D/A Dialogues—“A tightly-knit story, woven together with humor, pathos and just-around-the-corner danger, Ranger Martin, was everything I wanted out of a thriller. It starts out with a bang, and doesn’t let up until the final page.”

Jess’ Waiting on a Word—“As I read I lost myself in the story, swiping the pages over my iPhone any time I could spare a minute, and then about halfway through the action—BAM! Jack hit me with something I never expected. Wait? WHAT JUST HAPPENED? I thought, as I flipped back and re-read.”

Gina G.’s GG’s World—“It is a well paced story and then picks up speed to the point where you can’t put it down and will read until your tablet/kindle/ipad’s battery dies.  I lost a few hours of sleep this week reading it because I couldn’t put it down.”

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale tomorrow.

Posted in Monday Mayhem

The Walking Dead: Zombie Names

Posted on by Jack Flacco

Doesn’t it feel good to know there’s a comfortable place to relax when all hell breaks loose? Now that The Walking Dead is back on the air serving pleasant meals of Horror with a side dish of dark humor, wouldn’t it be nice to know what those names for those zombies actually mean?

The Walking Dead Season 4
The Walking Dead Season 4

Monday Mayhem is my series where I delve into all things zombie in order to gain a better understanding of the undead’s wicked ways. If this is your first time here, enjoy my back catalogue of zombie posts tailored specifically for the genre. If you want to see something in the future, drop me a line. I do take requests.

Okay, let’s have some fun!

One of the coolest aspects of AMC’s The Walking Dead is the show’s ability to entertain their audience with trivial things. In this case, names the writers choose to describe zombies. They could have gone and called them zombies, but you’ll never hear that. In fact, here’s a challenge: Find an instance in the show where any of the survivors refer to a zombie as a zombie. You won’t find it. What you will find, though, is a list of euphemisms to describe a zombie’s principal attribute.

The Walking Dead Cast
The Walking Dead Cast

What are they? I thought you’d never ask.

Walkers—These are the garden-variety zombies most often seen in the show. The virus transformed them from productive humans to deceased corpses with no other intent other than eat other humans. In a zombie horde, walkers make up the bulk of the frenzied mass.

Lurkers—A common name for zombies that have sustained a massive injury that prevents them from walking. These are the most dangerous because upon approach they seem dead yet can pounce at any time. They tend to grab hold of the victim and munch on a limb thereby spreading the virus, making the victim one of them.

Meat Puppets—The name given to zombies whose intelligence is so low that survivors consider them nothing more than mindless puppets of meat.

Floaters—Of all the zombies, these are the ones most pollutant to the environment. We can find them in the water either stuck somewhere or floating. Should survivors attempt to steer these beasts away, a mighty explosion may occur that’d dismember the floater and spill its entrails. Not fun when survivors need to travel the waterway corridor to get to the other side.

Roamers—They do nothing other than hunt for humans to devour. Much of the roamers’ days transpire with nothing more than lurching back and forth between feeding grounds. They’re main attribute is an insatiable appetite.

The list goes on: Biters, creepers, dead ones, empties, deadies, geeks, monsters, ghouls, goons, lame-brains, psychos, swimmers, and wanderers. I’m sure you can find more.

Nevertheless, what I’ve described are the dominant ones in the show. If you do know of any more, don’t hesitate to comment. I’m sure the folks looking for a thorough compendium to the show’s creativity would appreciate it.

Do you enjoy watching The Walking Dead? What is your favorite part of the show? Did you know about all the names the survivors have for the zombies?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

I Hated Zombies

Posted on by Jack Flacco

There once was a boy name Jack, and he hated zombies without lack. Crazy, isn’t it? That boy was me. I disliked zombies because I thought they were the stupid, malignant, dregs of Horror that amounted to nothing better than cheap laughs and gruesome kills.

Dead Rising 3
Dead Rising 3

Now that I have your attention, I’m dedicating this Monday Mayhem post to the skeptics. To all those folks who hate zombies and don’t know why. Ahem, because they think zombies are of the devil—or something so insanely ridiculous as such. This post goes out to you dislikers of the undead. Prove your hatred.

It wasn’t long ago when I, too, freely admit to have been one of the zombie naysayers. I’d thought vampires were cool and werewolves were powerful. But zombies? What did they have? I couldn’t get past their weak countenance. They wore torn clothes, for crying out loud. Even I could have punched one of them in the face to have it topple over like the scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.

Ah, but you see, that’s where I went wrong. I thought of a zombie as a single unit. That’s not where a zombie’s strength lies. Zombies don’t work that way. Separate a zombie from the crowd and yes, it’s time to say good-bye to another of the undead. However, as part of the horde, it’s as good as dug itself in like an Alabama tick. As a whole, they’re impenetrable; functioning as a single-minded mass with only one thing on their mind—eat.

Someone's in Trouble
Someone’s in Trouble

When did I change my view on zombies? I saw 28 Days Later late one night while my family slept, and I needed some solid entertainment. I didn’t know what the movie was at the time, having caught it a few minutes after the credits, but I watched it anyway. Hard not to watch someone waking up in hospital garb to what looks like a world gone crazy. Then have the movie tease me to a slow reveal. That’s what started it all for me. I saw the zombies. They weren’t weak but strong brutes able to turn other humans into zombies. And the humans were afraid of them. I thought, what is this? Shivers trailed my arms to my spine leading up my neck. The movie captivated me. I wanted more.

From there I went on a zombie binge. Within a week, I had seen 28 Days Later, 28 Weeks Later, Dawn of the Dead, Shaun of the Dead, and Zombieland.

The old Scooby-Doo paradigm I had carried for so long had all but disappeared, replaced by today’s zombie—a predator of vast proportions, able to seek and destroy those who’d dare get in the way. Their single-minded focus to rid the world of humans fascinates me. They act as Star Trek’s Borg, a collective bent on satiating eternal hunger pangs. How can I argue these zombies are weaklings?

To exacerbate the issue, I’d fallen in love with the notion zombies can reproduce. One bite is all it takes and a human is no longer with the living. In some respect, it might actually be an improvement since some folk are dead already.

Yae, naysayers, come and give pittance to your trite cause for slamming zombies wherefore you know nothing of. You hate the undead in ignorance. Let the beasts of the field show you the empty graves to those who will dismember the world.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

What do you like about zombies the most? Did you have an epic flip from hater to lover of the genre?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

Zombie: The Ultimate Pack Hunter?

Posted on by Jack Flacco

Wolves hunt in packs. One wolf is no match against the formidable majesty of an elk. But a pack of wolves can take down the beast without much effort, and share in its spoil. At first glance, zombie behavior seems to match that of wolves—hunting in packs, following their prey until it becomes fatigued, and sharing in the bounty. However, differences remain. This is Monday Mayhem, and these are my thoughts regarding zombie pack hunting.

Zombie pack hunters
Zombie pack hunters

Except for a few films, the majority depict zombies as pack hunters. The typical scenario involves a human stumbling in the midst of a zombie infested feeding ground and becoming the quarry in a quick game of cat and mouse against a horde of undead.

For the pack hunter idea to hold true, it would mean zombies would have to exhibit some form of intelligence in order to coordinate attacks against their victim. Given what we know about zombies—their lack of intellect, agility, and cooperation—coordinated attacks seem unlikely.

Wolves, on the other hand will organize into groups, stalk their prey, and give chase until it falls by the wayside. Should the prey enter a body of water, the pack will lay low while two or more of the ravenous killers stand guard by the edge.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes
Rise of the Planet of the Apes

Another difference with zombies and known pack hunters lies in their organization. A pack’s classic configuration contains an Alpha. He’s the dominant male that leads the pack to perform dastardly deeds of horror. Chimpanzees demonstrate this attribute in the wild when two males vie for the top position in the clan. A good example of the Alpha male conflict plays well in the movie Rise of the Planet of the Apes.

So if differences exist between the animal kingdom and zombie packs, what kind of hierarchy do the undead follow?

Zombies function on instinct. Yes, very much like animals. The main component to their internal makeup is their sense of tracking. When one of them spots a potential victim, others in the vicinity respond likewise. You might want to call it a built-in GPS. You can see this behavior at work in movies such as Dawn of the Dead and 28 Days Later.

Other than I Am Legend, which some consider a vampire flick, the Alpha male is missing in popular zombie movies. If anything, the undead act upon external stimuli in a uniformed and structured fashion. If one smells human, they all smell human. Thus, the chase begins. Soldiers can eliminate the front line of an advancing undead army, but zombies are too dumb to know when to give up. They’ll continue forward until every human becomes the evening’s main dish.

Inasmuch even I would enjoy seeing zombies emulate wolf pack behavior, the undead have their own agenda. I’m sure one day someone will come up with the idea of having an Alpha male leading a pack of zombies through an apocalypse. Until then, we have to wait and enjoy what we currently have at our disposal.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

What do you think of zombie packs? Do you think Alphas leading the horde would prove even more terrifying?

Posted in Monday Mayhem

Indestructible Zombies

Posted on by Jack Flacco

Let’s talk about something serious for a change, something that has been on my mind since the summer. If I could call it a great disturbance in the force, I would. But then I would have to admit surrendering to the dark side for taking the Star Wars universe out of context. Okay, so I’ll call it a logic problem. Then again, that may prove too pointed of a statement. How about this for Monday Mayhem: Since when have zombies become indestructible?

World War Z's Brad Pitt as Gerry Lane
World War Z’s Brad Pitt as Gerry Lane

I’m a huge fan of World War Z, and for those folks who have read my stuff since the beginning, you will know I’m also a fan of George A. Romero’s zombies. You know the ones, slow, dragging, lurching, not much intelligence. What they lack in aptitude they make up in multitude. In other words, they may be slow, but if they corner you in an alley with no way out, it’s lights out for Thursday night bowling—permanently.

It took a while for me to warm up to the notion zombies could run at the pace of a Kenyan sprinter. I attribute the sudden surge in velocity to an adrenalin rush fostered by the zombie virus, whatever that zombie virus might be. I accept it. It would also account for the incredible behavior change in the undead’s muscle stability and lack of flaccidity. Add to the laundry list a slow decomposition rate instead of the typical mortis states, and we have the making of fast zombies.

I’m okay with that idea. It makes logical sense.

World War Z's destroyed cities
World War Z’s destroyed cities

Where things start getting out of hand is seeing zombies crash into immovable objects at blunt-force-trauma speeds. When a head attempts several times to smash through a windshield, wouldn’t said head sport a few scars of the incident? Perhaps a concussion or two? Even more so, if a zombie attempts to scale a massive wall and other zombies use its body as a footstool, wouldn’t it be fair in saying said zombie would break a few bones in the process of its journey? And how about after scaling the wall, which I’m assuming thirty feet high, wouldn’t the zombies plunging to the other side land on the ground in a big huge splat?

Guide me here, folks. Sometimes I miss things along the way. I’m willing to suspend disbelief up to a point, but when the laws of physics run amok in a film—a zombie film, not a superhero comic book film—I’m not sure if I can accept the latest twist in zombie resilience. Anyone have a reasonable explanation for the undead’s sudden ability to fend off broken bones, torn ligaments, shattered faces and lack of rotting in World War Z?

So many questions, so little time.

RANGER MARTIN AND THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, on sale October 22.

What’s your reaction to World War Z’s superhero zombies?